Movie: Batman & Robin
Basic Plot: Who the hell knows.
I'm Okay With: Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
I'm Not Okay With: The fact that the Bat-suit has fucking nipples on it. The fact that Batman introduces himself to Mr. Freeze before their first fight when you know everyone in Gotham City knows who the hell Batman is, let alone that he was dressed as Batman. The fact that Batman and Robin float back to Earth on two flimsy doors at the beginning of the movie. The fact that everything in Gotham City seems to be covered with neon lights or black light paint. The fact that Mr. Freeze's evil plan was to steal money so that he could conduct research to save his wife when he could probably just get funding on his own without stealing it. The fact that when Mr. Freeze is captured, they put him in a jail cell that is really cold in order to keep him alive, but he wears a really thick robe while in there. The fact that Poison Ivy's character is just stupid and her evil plan just sounded more like a crazy Green Peace member than a Batman villain. The fact that Alicia Silverstone is apparently Alfred's niece despite being roughly 100 years younger than him. The fact that the Batmobile has no protective cover to shield Batman from bugs, let alone gunfire. The fact that every single line of dialogue in this movie was beyond terrible. The fact that I tried to watch this movie recently just so I could do this post and couldn't make it more than 30 minutes before I turned it off because it was that awful. I am not okay with any of this.
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| "Whoops, wrong Batman and Robin. Oh well, these guys were better anyways." |
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